Who I Am

I am the day and the night The dark and the light The virgin queen Perverse and obscene Real but a dream I am the pale moon shining down Into your soul as you drown With secrets you can never know Whispered, inaudible Quick, merciful and cold I am the shade under the tree As you rest your head to sleep Moving with the breeze to hide Cowardly leaving you behind To be burnt and fried I am empty yet I have all Beautiful, divine, terrible A vision incomplete I cannot be seen Unless you truly believe I am gold and dust Pure, worthless, unloved Without your love I won't ask for anything Other than everything Until you have nothing I hold your birth and life I pick when you will die I stand outside of time Who am I?

Someday, someday In muted yellow and grey I will lay down to die Bound by the earth Bound by the sky One day, one day My body will be free from pain I shall leave it behind Out from the ground Out I will fly Today, today The time passes as I wait Torn, sodden, and half-blind I long to go Yet, I want to be alive

I embrace these sweet patterns arise from cold cold embers to inhale swift pains in Hell his designs burnt into my eyes silent orbs inducing reducing seducing depth blush flushed and forced piercing through the flesh words barely read instead in eulogy a voice low and hoarse prior to my burial march hearing the cries echo searing into dull aches when all is empty and without taste "Such a waste" repeated until it has no meaning only shame draped in black within a hearse the line steady irreversible without rehearsal my parents trailing plodding ahead old age outliving youth in my coffin somehow lips and cheeks still vigorous red amidst the blue blue skin lids forced open jasmine and incense impart traces of stranger scents from a mortician's embalming fluids set beside the pallor of death the last scoop of earth shoved onto this berth the final resting place but not my end here I live but not in peace here I lie yet I did not die here I smile with a smile that doesn't

a demon lives in me silently bleeding unfeeling, unseen broodingly dark never free never leaving there is a demon who fills my heart takes all my energy tears me apart until I'm stark yet unclean this demon picks my bones gnawing me down, empty never alone from the cries yet alone all the time frighted and blighted terrified Damn you, Demon, be gone! What did I do so wrong? To have you by my side To listen to you In my mind Whispering words unkind Demon, you are blind You need my body to thrive You need me but I Do not need you Once I'm dead, What will you do? Let me turn out the light Snuff the candle wick Flick off the switch On all that's sick No, it's not another trick So go back to Hell, You Bitch